Anyway, it seems I need to get on this Buffy train real fast. I hear it's incredible. And according to Empire magazine, it's the second best show in history. Ever. For as long as there have been television shows, only one has been better. That's a pretty bold statement.
Dear Empire Magazine:
Let's get this straight. You're saying a vampire-ass kicking teenage girl is better than Tony Soprano telling Chrissy he'll lead the family into the 21st century; better than Nate telling Claire she can't take a picture, the moment is gone; better than Charlie slamming his hand against the window telling us it's not Penny's boat; better than present-Hiro meeting future-badass-Hiro and telling him to save the cheerleader; better than Jerry announcing he is, indeed, master of his domain!; than JD daydreaming about playing catch with Dr. Cox; than Al looking pitifully at his cohost and saying "I don't think so, Tim"; than Doogie falling asleep on the toilet after being on guard all night; than Ross screaming to high heaven that we were on a break!; than Pacey arguing with Joey using a vernacular far above their mere highschool education thereby challenging the status-quo; than Michael saying he's not superstitious, he's just a litte-stitious; or David Brent explaining what it feels like to be famous; than Jessie breaking down screaming "I'm so excited! I'm so Scaaared!!"; than Parker Lewis and his buddies synchronizing watches; than Dick nervously speaking to The Big Giant Head; than Andy Millman receiving phone sex tips from Kate Winslet; than Liz Lemon playing highschool football; than Six frakking Dr. Baltar; than Nancy and her little boxes made of ticky-tacky; than Niles clumsily asking Daphne to come to the cabin with him; than John Cleese going on to Something Completely Different, or yelling at Manuel!; better than Sheldon explaining how Leonard has as much chance of going out with Penny as the Hubble Telescope has of finding that at the center of each black hole there's a little man with a flashlight trying to find the circuit breaker. In fact, you're not only saying all this, oh no, you're saying Buffy the Vampire Slayer is even better than Matt's pitch-perfect delivery of: "Guy walks into a doctor's office with a duck on his head. Doctor says, "What can I do for you?" Duck says, "Doc, can you get this guy off my ass?"? And better than Church Lady, Wayne's World, The Mango, Opera Man, Debbie Downer, and the Spartan Cheerleaders all put together?!
Really? Really Empire Magazine?
Ok, then. Fair enough. I'll take your word for it and begin the downloads. Err, I mean... trips to my local video rental shop.
By the way, on number one? What else? The Almighty Simpsons.
Find the list here.Up next: I'll probably be arguing with myself about making a personal top 10 or something. And I'm not sure that's a battle I can win.
PS CONTEST: If you can name every show referenced, you might be eligible to win a prize.
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